What a Nice Guy by Torcivia Phil

Author:Torcivia, Phil [Torcivia, Phil]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Humor
Published: 2011-09-06T18:30:00+00:00

Reversal

Freaking Murphy and his law. Piss me off. The day after I get my vasectomy I go on a first date with a contender. The date is rolling along perfectly. After mutual chemistry is established and a few glasses of pinot are imbibed, the inevitable discussion begins—one I should have prepared for.

“So, do you have any children?”

“Nope.”

Uh, oh.

“Me neither. I really look forward to having one.”

“Do you?”

“Oh, yes. I just turned forty, so we’d better get moving. Ha, ha!”

“No doubt.”

“I think I only want one, though.”

“Right.”

“How about you?”

Yikes!

“I turn fifty this year.”

“Really? You look great for fifty.”

“You’re too kind, half blind, and you have a lovely behind.”

“You’re silly.”

“Yes, I am. Say, should we get some dessert?”

“Wait a minute, mister. You didn’t answer the question.”

“Which question was that?”

“Are you eager to have children?”

My friends, even the female ones, assured me that it was unnecessary to provide full disclosure concerning my reproductive abilities early in a relationship. Still, I’m an unskilled liar and in the off-chance this relationship grows into something substantial, once the deception is exposed, I’ll be hosed.

“It’s funny that you ask.”

“Really? Why?”

I could see her mind search through the possibilities:

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